THE CASE OF THE LOST TORCH
                                                                                          By Arse Nick
                                                                                                       
Narrator: It was a dark night it wasn't stormy every night that is dark in a mystery isn't stormy. I had just gotten home from work to call my wife from my iPhone 5™ but there wasn't any reception, but then I had found reception.  So I had called her and she said that I should turn on the news so I did.

News Anchor: "Tonight on channel 277 news at 8.  Lady Liberty's torch has been stolen we take you over to our field correspondent Tom for more details", "Tom".

Tom:  "Thanks News Anchor sorry we never gave you a real name we're here we're recorded this isn't live folks isn't that exciting that we can cut anything out from this story I mean that's what you get for watching channel 277", "anyways all I can tell you is that there was a jar of 100 dollar bills we don't have that much evidence because were only channel 277 why don't you watch channel 6 or something for details back to you, News Anchor".

News Anchor: "Thanks Tom and guys watch something else not channel 277 okay"


Narrator: Okay I see wife oh and neither you nor I have a name it's just wife and Narrator.  So I had to decide what to do even though I don't need to do anything I didn't steal it so I put it to a lot of thought and decided something you never would think of.  I called the police, so I called them and they asked where I heard that from and I said channel 277.  So they said that I should turn the field correspondent in and I was wondering why and I came to the thrilling conclusion that it's because he did it and I figured out why.  So he had decided that he wasn't rich enough even though he had a limo and a jar of 100 dollar bills so he went to the statue of liberty and stole the torch. Now I don't know how he got it from her hands.

Narrator: So he went to jail and what might you ask happened to that news channel well I got a letter from them asking me if I want to work there and I said no I because the suck as a news channel so they gave it to a cat name Catherine do you get it, neither do I.  So that is the time that the statue of liberty's torch was stolen.  Okay class, hey why do I hear snoring, whatever?